Hello Again, From the Other Side (of 2024)

I’m rising from the dead, figuratively, of course.

Hi there,

It’s been a minute, hasn’t it? I know I’ve been MIA for a while, but life got overwhelmingly real when I moved countries for my master’s. Writing took a backseat, and I just lived one day at a time. I had to send this 6 days ago, but I brought my procrastination with me into 2025. The truth is, I was too busy living in the moment to pause and reflect. I last wrote to you when I was on a plane moving halfway across the world. It's been 1.5 years, and I’m still in transition, just moving jobs and cities. I completed my master’s (graduating soon) and I am living in London. Don’t worry, I’ll spare you the existential crisis, I’ve got that part covered, and it’s in a “we’ll figure it out” kind of place.

But, let’s talk about adulthood for a second, shall we? You know, the whole “moving to a new country” thing? It’s hard. But moving to London? Oh boy. You’d think house-hunting in Bangalore was tough, wait until you have to submit your LinkedIn profile to prove you're worthy of renting a place. Yeah.

Living in London has been this emotional rollercoaster I never quite expected. London is more lonely than anyone tells you, even when I live with my sister and a friend and we eat our meals together and do almost everything together, it does get lonely. My friends moved to different cities and parts of the world. I had to say goodbye to people this year, more times than I wanted to. People moved away, relationships shifted, and I kept collecting those moments. Could I have said something different? Could I have held onto that hug just a second longer? I knew we were moving on, but I didn’t want to face it. And so, I rushed through the goodbyes, treating them like ordinary moments when they were anything but. In August 2024 we were all living in the same place, just a lift away, eating all meals together, sitting on their bed on Valentine’s Day because we did not have plans, going for walks at 3 am and getting a drink at the cathedral, making last minute karaoke plans, running up and down to get outfit approvals, getting ready for balls and classes together. Now, we try to catch up on video calls talking about life-changing events, and since everyone has moved, we feel like we are an inconvenience and like why would people want to be around when they have moved in their life and have 100 different things to worry about?

I’ve always believed that a flower vase is a metaphor for life, it’s up to us to keep it filled. In 2024, my vase was never empty. I got flowers, I bought flowers, and somehow, that simple act reminded me to cherish the good, however small or fleeting it seemed (I also recorded 100 days of happiness, and I was actually happy). (If you’re on my private Instagram, you know)

2024 has been a year of firsts for me: I started my first 9-to-5 job in an office (from a work-from-home generation, it was a culture shock but fun), dipped my toes into freelancing, and somehow, managed to say more “yes” than “no” to opportunities. Oh, and let's talk about my first big girl job in the city. You just have to step outside the comfort zone and you have seats waiting for you at tables you never imagined you'd get invited to.

About home, I have always thought about creating a space that's mine. You know that dream of a home with a spare bedroom for whoever needs a place to crash? I’ve got it now. My kitchen is always stocked, I have an extra bed and set of sheets for people to stay over, and my house never feels empty, it's a home that feels like home. I even managed to take my first-ever Europe trip, filled with so many “firsts.” I also did Ice skating for the first time ever (I didn’t fall as much as I thought I would), tried sock curls (and yes, they worked!), and travelled to places I’ve only ever seen in photos, life felt full and, sometimes, completely overwhelming.

This year, I also went viral and ended up in Indian newspapers (my mom was thrilled). It’s been a whirlwind, but somehow, I managed to balance all the noise and find moments of quiet joy.

This year taught me that grief isn’t just for the dead. It’s also for relationships, friendships, and people that are no longer with you. I loved someone, lost it, (that’s another newsletter actually), learned to love myself more, to take better care of myself, more water, more fruits, more self-love. But it wasn’t always easy. As Heidi Priebe said, “As long as there is love, there will be grief.” Grief shows up in the smallest things: a familiar song, an old photo, a memory that hits you out of nowhere. It’s not linear, and it doesn’t go away—but grief comes with love. And I’ve learned that love is something I will carry with me, even in the hardest moments.

I've also learned some tiny but important things this year. Like how self-care isn't just about spa days (though those are nice). It's the little things, like changing your sheets, lighting a candle, or sitting down for a meal that makes everything feel a little more in place. And yes, it’s okay to be alone sometimes, not lonely, but just being in your own company, finding peace in the silence and binge-watching a shitty show.

2024 wasn't perfect. No year ever is. But the good days definitely outnumbered the bad ones. And for that, I’m thankful. My flower vase stayed full, and I’m carrying that energy into 2025.

Next year, I want to keep building on this momentum: Cook more, eat my vitamins, eat out less, and maybe finally start using retinol (it’s time, right?). Also, write more, and send you more emails. For now, send this to a friend maybe?

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Links I’ll whatsapp you if we were friends:

Give your friends a chance to abandon you

The secret to love is just kindness

Hating yourself less

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(On some days I’m only writing because I know the 5 people who will definitely read this and write back to me. I love it when you write back to me and tell me how you feel, what you like or what you think can be improved. You can just reply to this or drop a text on any of my socials, I appreciate it so much and I’ll get back to you soon, Promise)

Drink some water and buy yourselves some flowers.

See you in the next chapter,

Janhavi